“Do not fear mistakes. There are none.”
Believe it or not: there was a time before Satan & Megastar. A time of innocent wonder, care free days that echoed with nervous laughter, unsullied by cynicism’s deep teeth. Back then there were just two people whose lives had unexpectedly been thrown together. Or in at the deep end. Whatever it was, it was not fate. Fumbling around, trying desperately not to succumb to the natural urges to hide (or lash out), the common ground that we can now blame for so much turned out to be Bon Jovi.
Lisa was running a small record label (before it was stolen from her, but that’s a different story) that was toying with the idea of releasing a record of Bon Jovi covers. “Oh, you know, ‘Keep The Faith’ was the first record I ever bought,” I said (and, as always, instantly regretted). “Why don’t we record a Bon Jovi cover?” We said simultaneously (we can’t read each other’s minds any more, or, more accurately, we choose not to: It’s fuckin’ scary in there).
You’d think with so much quality to choose from, we would have spent weeks deciding which song to do. Lisa knew straight away: “Let’s turn ‘She Don’t Know Me’ into a duet,” she said. “I don’t know that one?” Now I do.
Bon Jovi – She Don’t Know Me
Believe it or not: it was mixing that song that brought us together in the first place. Maybe we were both using it as an excuse to spend more time together. Awkwardly. Whatever the case, we recorded the song, and then forgot about it amongst the graveyards and Twiggy Eyes. And the K Ciders. And more graveyards.
The other day I was hit by one of those suddon pangs of nostalgia (I was drunk, on my own) and stumbled across the recording on my computer (I knew I wanted to hear it, I love torturing myself). “Why don’t we just give it away as, like, some Christmas thing?” I asked. “Why the fuck not?”
I must have deleted the individual files in a stupor, all that remains of those wild days is this MP3, that you can have, for free, if you want.
And then I came to write something about the song and found out that ‘She Don’t Know Me’ is actually not even by Bon Jovi, but written by a guy called Mark Avsec. Apparently it is the only song on any Bon Jovi record that was not at least co-written by a member of the band. “Too good to be true!” I thought to myself. Turns out the truth is just as entertaining as all the lies we tell ourselves, and each other. All the time. AJM, 17.12.2012
Peter Emmett – She Don’t Know Me
“I think my speeches are hilarious. I think I’m a natural comedian, but I like denying people the chance to laugh. I want to deny you the relief of the punchline.”